68/126

In the last 68 days, as you know, I've had my ups and downs with the eating and exercise, and now I'm definitely on the 'up' side of things and planning to keep myself there! One thing I've noted before, and it's worth noting again (so that my stupid brain may eventually 'get it') is how much more alive and awake I feel when I get some exercise and eat good food, particularly living food. I'm making an effort to add more raw stuff into my day, but only to an extent that I'm still having fun with the idea.

Believe me, I'm not about to become a raw-foodist, or a vegan, or especially a vegan raw-foodist (wonderful as they may be). I had a bad trip in my teenage years with believing that veganism, then raw-foodism, then fruitarianism was the best and only path to a long and disease-free life. Unfortunately, the result was that the restriction of it drove me directly into binge eating disorder for many, many years. I no longer believe that idealism is a workable approach to food. A way of eating is not a religion, you don't go to hell if you break the rules.

Today, being Sunday, I slept in then got myself to the gym for a combat-style class. Although I always feel like the most un-co person in the room, it was super fun. Breakfast was my usual cacao beans, banana, almond milk, agave and maca combo, to which I am fiercely devoted, and my Omega 3's. I did not photograph it because.. how many brownish smoothies does the world really need to see? I may change my mind about this tomorrow ;)

Today I had the same extreme hunger problem as yesterday. I'm wondering if it's part of caffeine withdrawal? I seem to remember in the past getting the hungries for about a week when I've gone cold turkey off the espresso. I wouldn't say I'm undereating or overexercising, so it's probably something like that. Early afternoon I had a cup of pineapple, 2 squares of raw chocolate, a tsp of nut butter and a dandelion espresso. That shut my growling stomach up for about half an hour ;-/

Mid afternoon I had half a lara bar and a tsp of nut butter. Then I brewed up a horsetail tea, which is very high in Silica. My naturopath friend David reminded me that silica is the very thing for tissue calcification, which I have in the right rectus femoris tendon. I'm sure that it's related to the arthritis too.

My rye berries had sprouted enthusiastically and I couldn't put off the essene bread making messiness. I also experimented with a few different mixes involving dried fruit, spices and cacao beans. I'll let you know how those work out. There was quite a bit of sampling going on. It's important to sample. At Sana Direct we sample a lot. Of course, that's for the lab tests, not my tastebuds, but QA is QA.Dinner was lots of salad, my favourite mashed kumara and some lamb shank. Of course, that was about an hour ago and, yet again, I'm hungry. This is outrageous! I want to complain to the management. I'd like to exchange my appetite for a less annoying one, thanks, that would be great.